The Survival Guide for Rookie Moms

As Postpartum OCD slammed against my shores, skies darkened as angry bolts of lightning seared through the atmosphere. Booms of thunder rattled the atmosphere sending me scurrying away. I hunkered down in a deep dark cave, curled up in the fetal position, wishing the skies would clear. Eventually they did. Puffy white clouds replaced dark angry ones. I crept slowly towards the exit of my cave, my safe haven. The laughter and comraderie filling the valleys no longer grated on my nerves. Not even the whining and crying could push me back into the darkness. In fact, I have forgotten my cave’s very location– I like to think it’s been overgrown with Birds of Paradise.

This afternoon with the kids was completely blissful. All three played together in the floor without arguing. They peacefully shared toys and burst with laughter. Grace wove a wonderful tale of marital bliss with George’s toy cars. Elizabeth giggled at George’s newfound block playing skills. And George heartily immersed himself in the attention his sisters showered upon him.

I immersed myself in the joy of watching my three children enjoy each other’s company. THIS is what motherhood is like without the angry and confusion of a mood disorder. Moments like these- moments so tantalizingly perfect never fail to blow me away. They make all my time in the horrible cave worth it – all the struggling, the fighting, the tears, the pain – all of it makes the joy I now feel so much brighter.

New moms struggling with postpartum mood disorders know about this cave.. In this cave they feel safe yet distantly fearful at the same time. The cave is where nothing makes sense yet they cannot find a way to seek help because all exits seem to loop back to the cold dark tiny room.

When you are struggling with a mood disorder, the two most important things you can do are to first recognize things are not as they seem and second is to reach out for help whether it be from a friend first and then a caregiver. Many women have found it to be helpful to write down their symptoms before going to their caregiver. A mom seeking professional help may find her symptoms interfering with her daily living for more than a week. Her list of symptoms may include anxiety, worry, irritability, sleep pattern issues, crying for no reason, loss of interest in regular activities, withdrawal from or hyper-attention to her infant.

It is important to be aware of treatment options and be wary of a doctor who whips out his prescription pad in the first two minutes of your appointment. A good doctor will work with you and listen to your needs. Be sure to ask for a thyroid test as thyroid issues may sometimes masquerade as postpartum mood disorders. Most often antidepressants and a form of talk therapy are the most successful at helping a mother to recover and regain her sense of self. There are also natural approaches towards managing a postpartum mood disorder as well. Some women have even had success with a dietary approach.

Families can help new moms with postpartum mood disorders by providing a supportive network available to help with meals, housework and childcare. They can also be available to listen compassionately without judging to the new mom vent about her struggles and issues. We need a soft yet strong place to land. We need to know it is okay for us to fall apart and to be held together by those around us as we heal and renovate the new addition into our lives.

There is help available for you if you find yourself struggling with a postpartum mood disorder. Postpartum Support International has coordinators in all 50 states and even some international locations. You can find their website by clicking here. You are not alone. It is time to raise your voice and use the courage you have deep inside of you even if you are not sure it is there. You might just be surprised.

As a survivor of everything Motherhood has thrown at her, Lauren Hale loves every day more than the last. She also can’t wait until bedtime when she can kick up her heels, slosh back a big cup of cinnamon tea while watching House or Fringe.

Follow Lauren’s blog at http://unexpectedblessing.wordpress.com

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Read Our Archived Guest Blog Posts

Laura with NCT – Laughter, Support, Sobbing and a Lot of Cake

Rookie Dad Terry with More Than Just Words

Dr. Kim Newell with Hacking Up a Lung: What is the Best Cough Medicine for Kids?

Becky Goddard-Hill with How to Survive a Family Christmas on a Budget

Kim Greenlee of Sprig Toys with The Right Stuff (in the toy aisle)