The Survival Guide for Rookie Moms

The year was 1971 and my mother had decided to take my brother and I to see our family in England. It was my first transatlantic flight – my first flight anywhere in fact. I can remember excitedly polishing off a bowl of spaghetti and meatballs before heading for the airport, watching the big planes taking off and the classic Pan-Am pin-badge they gave us as we took our seats. The flight itself was uneventful and as the 707 started its decent into London Heathrow, all seemed well. Then, without warning, I turned to my mother and violently deposited the contents of my stomach onto her lap. I can vaguely remember thinking, “That’s strange, I didn’t even feel sick”, for even at the age of five I knew that being ill was normally accompanied by feeling ill. I also remember feeling quite sorry for my poor mum as she patiently attempted to clean what had been her favourite blue dress. She was always very kind and understanding about such things and the guilt soon passed as my thoughts turned to playgrounds, beaches and matchbox cars.

38 years later and my wife and I were packing for a trip to England with our two little ones. My son had never flown before so I briefly recounted the tale of my first flight and casually suggested to Lorraine that I pack a change of clothes in my hand baggage. As we sat in the airport lounge with the sense of relaxation that can only be achieved after checking in twelve pieces of luggage I reflected that, if karma really exists, Lewis would spew all over me coming into Heathrow. Lorraine smiled apprehensively and we gave it no further consideration. To our relief, he slept for a good chunk of the flight and we were both able to get a few hours of fitful slumber. As we began our decent into Heathrow I slotted Lewis into his special lap belt and he playfully poked at the video screen. A tiny jolt of the torso was the only warning as he suddenly projectile vomited all over his and my lap. I sat in a sick, paralysed wonder as further waves followed, ensuring a thorough coverage of my arm and leg. I’m not always the calmest person, but I felt no anger or even dismay. A faint, knowing smile crossed my face and I sensed that another step in the journey of parenthood had been taken. The circle was complete.

We often look at our kids and wonder how they will take after us, hoping they get the good bits and miss out on the bad ones. Sometimes we can see a behaviour or an attitude and try to change it with a wise word or a cautionary tale. Sometimes though, I have a feeling there’s nothing more we can do than pack accordingly.

Tim – A Rookie Dad

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Read Our Archived Guest Blog Posts

Sarah from Better Way Moms on Storing Breast Milk

Melanie from GirlGetStrong on Seeing the World Through Different Eyes

Pediatician Dr. Kim MD on Fairy Dust or Wizardry: What are those Crystals in my Baby’s Diaper?

Fit4Two Postnatal Fitness Expert Melanie on Surviving Your First Fitness Class With Baby

Rookie Dad Terry on Bedtime Woes